Sunday, November 25, 2007

Person of the week -- you decide

I've been away a while, enjoying the holidays, but I'll make it up to ya. Check back for at least three more blog entries this week.

Here are three people in Houston who are up for my "person of the week award" based on my observations. You pick who's the best, but I can tell you that they're all winners in my book. The first two finalists will be introduced in a story...

On Sunday nights we go to a small group bible study at a friend's house. We left a few minutes early last week to pick up some Capri Sun at the grocery store for all the kids at the group meeting. Parked the van at the store, and I ran inside to get the drinks while Jamie and kids waited in the car. "Be right back", I said. Idiot. I jinxed myself from the very beginning.

I went inside the store, grabbed the box of Capri Sun and went to the checkout line. The "Express" line, to be exact. There was only one guy in front of me buying only three items -- deodorant, paper plates and a chocolate cake from the bakery section. Shouldn't take more than 60 seconds, right?

The cashier scans the first two items then tries to pick up the chocolate cake. Oops. The container's plastic top comes off as he picks it up, and the entire cake crashes down into the basket, icing-side-down. Crap.

So I figure the cashier has two options at this point. Option #1 -- void the whole transaction and scan my single item sitting on the conveyor belt until they get the other guy a new cake. Option #2 -- go ahead and scan the messy cake's price tag, let the guy pay, and then go get him a new cake from the bakery. Either way, I should still be less than 60 seconds away from leaving the store.

The cashier chooses... neither option. He picks up the intercom phone and asks for a manager to come help. We wait two minutes. Nobody comes. He calls again. Two more minutes. Nobody comes. Finally a manager comes out of a room not more than 30 feet away, and proceeds to walk right past us. The cashier immediately gets on the intercom, "DEBRA! Aisle TWO!". She comes over and hears the tragic cake story.

Debra proceeds to take the cake and its plastic casing back to the bakery, and see if there is a replacment cake. We wait some more. After about three minutes, the customer says, "Well, I can tell you the price of the cake. It was $5.99, if you want to go ahead and ring it up."

What?!? You've known the price during the past 10 minutes we've all been standing around?! As the cashier is working the register, Debra comes back with a new cake. And it has a price tag of $10.99. The cashier delivers the news to the customer, and says he must have remembered the wrong price. The customer responds...

"$10.99? For that price, I don't want it."

He didn't buy the cake. It took me 15 minutes to buy the box of Capri Sun.

The cashier and the customers are two finalists for "person of the week". The third finalist is the guy I saw using his phone to write text messages, while driving 70mph on the highway. Smart.

Note: These are sarcastic deliveries of true events. I am still thankful for the ability to go to the store and buy safe, packaged drinks for the kids. That's a privilege much of the world does not have.


Roland said...

I love cake.

MamaRose said...

Well, if you're like me, and you probably ARE--I always CHOOSE the SLOWEST line, even when I TRY TO CHOOSE THE FASTEST--so, now, I've got a NEW WAY OF DECIDING: I look at them all & 'really decide' & THEN I go to ANOTHER ONE!!!!!!!!!
So far it's working--YEA, me!!!!!!
Give it a try, why don't you?!!!!!
LOVE YA, Mom--glad you got the drinks for the kiddos!!!!!!!!!