Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Kids and the funny

I'm back from Myrtle Beach! Wrote up a summary here, if you'd like to read it. Tonight I'd rather write about funny kid stuff. This post will ramble a little, but come back around full circle in a hopefully-funny way, like a Seinfeld episode.

Jack's Joke

Jack-Jack has now learned how to tell jokes, at the tender age of 22 months. Well, he only knows one joke, and it's not really funny, but we count it. Here it is:

Jack: Knock-knock.
Us: Who's there?
Jack: (Looks around and finds something; different every time)... Cracker!
Us: Cracker who?
Jack: Cracker ON YOUR HEAD!!

He's told this joke dozens of times, with many different objects, and the punch line is always on our head. Samantha even plays along and laughs when he tells it. He's starting to push the envelope and change it to "on your finger", but it's still a work in progress.

Jack's Bonks

The day after his stomach-and-fever episode finally ended, I went to the office as usual. Less than two hours later, Jamie called me to say that Jack fell off our bed while jumping on it, and was gushing blood out of a very open wound on his forehead. He had smacked it on the corner of my nightstand, probably in an attempt to do a Triple Lindy or something.

He didnt' end up needing stitches -- instead, they used Dermabond to seal it. Pretty cool stuff, and he could even take a bath with it.

To help deal with the stress in a healthy way, I did some photo editing and made this picture:

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Samantha's Super Senses

Lately I've been introducing the kids to my special soundtrack compilation CD, which includes a lot of John Williams. Mostly the essentials -- Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Goonies, Willow, etc...

One of them is of course the Superman theme. Samantha calls it the "trumpet song". But she also has an incredible ear for all the other instruments, and names them as they are introduced into the music. I assume she learned this from the Baby Einstein DVDs.

Remember, though, she has no context for this song. While we hear it and imagine Christopher Reeve flying before the sunrise, she only knows it as the trumpet song.

Anyway, I'm taking Samantha to school and have the trumpet song playing in the van. She looks out the window and exclaims, "Look, Daddy! Up in the sky! It's a plane!".

I'm not kidding.

Thomas' New Tunnel

Like most American kids these days, ours have a Thomas the Train set. Two of the trains (Lady and James, I believe) are battery-operated and can move pretty well. Samantha was playing trains with Jack, and thought it would be funny for Lady to go right over the top of her head. Oops. The wheels got caught up in her hair, and wound up tight. She ran to me, having a huge freak out, just saying, "Oh, no! Oh, no! Ohhhhh!".

We got her upstairs (after I turned off the train) and took a closer look to see if we could untangle the mess, or if it was time to get out the scissors. In the end it took some of both to free Lady from the auburn curls.

Mostly Samantha cried during the ordeal, but I was able to crack a joke or two to calm her down. Evidence:

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Of course, Jack told her a joke too, just trying to help. I'm sure you can guess:

Jack: Knock-knock.
Sam: (Sniff) Who's there? (Sniff)
Jack: Train.
Sam: Train who?
Jack: Train ON YOUR HEAD!!


~aj~ said...

That was seriously laugh out loud funny. Well not the train stuck in the hair part. Leave it to Jack Jack to turn it into a humorous situation. :)

Anonymous said...

Such a SAD 'Samantha-face'!!!!!!!!!
SO GLAD you got it out without having to SHAVE HER HEAD!!!!! She has NO idea what trials she AVERTED, huh???!!!!! And, that Jack is ONE FUNNY GUY--like his Dad. LOVE YA'LL!!!!! Mom

MamaRose said...

WHAT A PUTTER--I didn't even know ANY of them sold for THAT MUCH--WAY TO GO! Does Tiger use that one, since it's a Nike? And, Sam's 'PLANE/Superman' statement is TRULY AMAZING!!!!!!!!! LOVE YA, Mom

Redlefty said...

Ah, the mystery of Tiger's clubs. Nobody knows for sure, but I can guarantee you two things about what he uses on the tour:

1. Labels are deceiving. For instance, his famous chip-in at the Masters, where the Nike logo showed clearly before the ball dropped in? That was a Titleist ball, with a Nike logo. Sponsors and merchandising create all kinds of weird combinations that the companies will allow just to get a piece of Tiger.

2. Whatever Tiger plays, it's almost certainly not available at any golf store. He works very closely with the equipment companies to get everything exactly right for him, from the super-stiff shafts to a grooved wedge face that would slice your fingers open if you touched it.

But for my purposes, I'll be telling the golf store that I'm trading in Tiger's putter. Maybe they'll go for it?

MamaRose said...

THANKS for all the info--I had NO IDEA!!!! Hope you get LOTS of GOOD STUFF when you trade your putter in!!!! LOVE YOU, Mom

Roland said...

Absolutely Hilarious. Welcome back.

FishrCutB8 said...

Welcome back redfamily